Friday, November 14, 2014

IRREALITY OF HAPPINESS

Such a superabundance of joy rolled over me in waves of ecstasy, dappling my rational faculties, illumining my sense of wonder at life and running over this whole profusion of joy in great rolling waves, whose ebb and flow, leaving behind iridescent nuggets of wisdom, glowing fitfully, even in the penumbral recesses of my mind, where their luminous sheen was discernible, as a measure of the joy i had discovered, or rather gleaned from my experience of the impalpable, that i was overwhelmed, irradiated with inexpressible happiness.
And to what did i owe this moment ? Well it was the momentousness of the moment. The moment that was both there yet not there. The moment that existed only in the casing of its occurrence. The moment while eluded my grasp because i could only experience it in the temporality it was sheathed in. Thus the impossibility of inscribing wherein what occurred just now and seen retrospectively is somehow an hieroglyphic arabesque that is both indecipherable yet pellucid.
Perhaps it was the very uncapturability that thrilled me so. By suspending conscious control i inhabited the moment. Yet the ephemerality of the moment wasn't in vain . It left imperceptible indentations on my being, in some subtle way by transforming the way i looked at life. Like a concentric ripple the moment billowed out, encompassing the vastness of my being while its own wellspring remained unknown, indeed dissolved.
Furthermore this metamorphosis within me testified to my immanence within the moment. Though the moment was causal, with its own attendant temporal dimension it was also atemporal in that when it intersected with my being it reduplicated carillons and contraltos of incandescence sonorously across the consciousness of my integument. A cleaving and dissevering, simultaneous, is taking place, out of these incorporeal interminglings something tangible is being given form. That tangible form is both the residuum and the continuum of the moment. In the refuse of the moment is its continuity.Amid its accreting dimensions of interpenetration a frangible congealing is taking place, fluid and protean yet dense and durable.
The intimation of happiness i testify to is the amorphous concatenation of this process, worked out in infinitesimal permutations.

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