Sunday, May 20, 2012

A GAY DISCOURSE ON LOVE.

Predicate. I breathe through your pores and traverse your internal tracts. Like an iridescent filament i navigate you, pausing here and there, turning a thought, rolling it, savoring it, inhaling it. I am a locus where that which is seen and heard and that which is unacknowledged intersect. Gravid with longings unmet, of desires unsatiated, of love unexperienced i inhabit a subfusc hinterland where desire and its facsimile are tangibly unfathomable. You are insubstantial, since indeterminate and your equivocation underlies your durability. When i experience vertiginous chasms opening beneath me as fear rolls over me, a prickle of primordial terror stipples my being with daubs of shame and self loathing.. You are the conduit i funnel through to arrive at the nebulous sense of myself. I am irradiated by your luminosity and under its unwavering flame i tread on a path of self awareness, consecrating our love, imbuing it with brushstrokes of moments of passion.

Oh the crenellations of your body, each crevice, each pore is studded with special significance. Each aperture opens into unknown vistas. Your fleshly integument sheathes your being, a being you became. It is to that essence that i seek a cleaving into. When our lips are twinned our indivisible sense of ourselves interpenetrate. Your mouth is an unceasing fount of compassion i seek again and again, my senses inflamed, my points of desire engorged. The panoply of love is contained in your lips which are mirrors to your innermost core. The serrated edges of your teeth graze and pierce my corporeality and etch themselves in spiralline hieroglyphics across my body. Your fragrant breath is suffused with pellucid intimations of intoxicating pleasures. As i peregrinate your curvilinearity , each aspect of your landscape is indelibly imprinted in my consciousness. You emit incandescence wherein every baroque fantasy i nurture is streaked with the afterglow of legitimacy. Your body is a palimpsest where i rewrite the forms our love takes;its conditions never. And the oleaginously enticing repletion you expend is like ambrosia to me. Its alternating sweetness and tartness are like a sacrament i consume, consolidating the love i feel for you.

You and i we come into existence through negation. The negation without and within solder together to constitute a positive affirmation. We've travelled numerous labyrinths of simultaneous contraction and spilling out and eked out a mode of being. We've created yourself afresh each moment. In that crepuscular moment when my benumbed consciousness saw itself reflected in the mirror of the world i abrogated myself. I allied myself to the image i wanted to be. Yet what i wanted to be and what i was were irreconciliably  fragmented. By turning away from the mirror and by turning inward the gaze of immanence i reconstituted myself anew. It was not the worldly terms but the fetters we imposed on ourselves that constrained us. And today, being with you, a cavalcade of visceral sensations permeates me with fusillades of self containment. I am the votive offering i hold up to you. In giving of myself i find myself. You make me find me.

3 comments:

  1. So much poetical exploration of Love and oneself! Have you ever read Barthes' Love poems, Bharat? I can't remember the text they are included in, offhand.

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  2. In giving of myself i find myself. You make me find me.....
    This is poetry in prose and...beautiful! I would call it A Discourse on Love.

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  3. hey this one is tremendously romantic. I like the whole and soul of it.

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